Give Yourself Permission to Be an Expert

Dear friend,

While we’ve been creating a networking strategy for you to develop into a leader in your community and field, I’ve noticed you worrying about whether you have “real” expertise to share with your colleagues at work — or with contacts you’re meeting as you’re developing your professional path.

As your friend, it pains me to know that you have such beautiful gifts, intelligence, and passion, but aren’t aware of (or acknowledging) these talents.

By being living, breathing human beings, we are each acquiring personal observations and specific knowledge of the systems, people, environments and tasks we interact with every day. You may not realize you’re doing this, but you always have been. Based on the experiences that have shaped your life, you pay attention to the world around you in a way that is as unique as your thumbprint. Plus, knowing how ambitious you are, there’s no way you’d be happy working in a job for these past years without having opportunities to grow, learn and accomplish cool things.

Here are some thought starters to help you recognize and explore your unique point of view:

• What do other people compliment me on? (Your friends and coworkers may be able to see types of nuance in your perspective better than you can)
• What accomplishments are you most proud of in your life? (Do you look for others on a similar journey, or pay special attention to news about this topic? Do you know ways to measure progress and achievement here that may not be obvious?)
• What are some of the areas of injustice that bother you most? (Not everyone sees the world the same way — so sharing your observations about gender balance or vegetarian options or disability-accessible public transportation can be totally eye-opening.)

If none of those questions are sparking energy and recognition of your deep-seated wisdom, I have a hunch the issue might be not one of expertise, but one of confidence. (Hear me out here.)

I’m guessing there may be a secret subtext in your voice, one that’s asking: who am I to share my thoughts? A fear that your contributions might be judged or unworthy.

I used to have that fear permanently stamped on my forehead. I experienced environments where I was expected to show up but not express an independent opinion, so I became convinced my thoughts and ideas were actually worthless and shouldn’t be expressed.

But, playing small and trying to be invisible is not why any of us were put on this planet.

And, recognizing and stepping into your power makes work — and life — a hell of a lot more fun.

The only person who needs to authorize you to share your ideas is YOU. Give yourself permission to be an authority on your work. You don’t have to be the world’s best researcher, marketer, or writer to start helping and teaching those around you.

Take the higher-ups in your company (and your industry) as an example. You’re exposed to completely different information and problems than they are every single day. What are the leaders around you needing that you might be able to provide?

• Connection. Sometimes the highest executives in a field spend all day putting out fires and “being the boss,” so they don’t get a chance to speak with someone on a purely human level about what makes them tick or why they got into a field
• Local experts. These individuals, while experts in some part of their field, don’t know everything already. You have specialized expertise based on your experience, whether it’s in knowing leaders and whos-who in a different industry or sharing a case study from your own work. You don’t have to be Seth Godin or Gary Vaynerchuk to give marketing advice.
• Reverse mentoring. It takes a lot of confidence to speak truth to power, particularly as a more junior staff member, so being willing to offer thoughts on the trends you’re noticing in your own sector or smart ideas you saw competitors execute can be a big asset to them. Being informed and able to offer an alternate perspective can help make a leader smarter and sharper when it comes to upcoming business opportunities.

When it comes to a fear of contributing, Marianne Williamson says it best:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, ‘Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?’ Actually, who are you not to be?…There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do…It’s not just in some of us; it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”