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Episode 74: How to redefine wealth with Patrice Washington

Welcome to The Career Clarity Show, where we help you find a lucrative, soulful, and joyful career path for you!

To kick off the new year we are talking about how to think about defining success, defining wealth, defining achievement, defining your life on your own terms this year and how to take the steps, big or small to create the kind of life that you’re going to feel proud of. 

If you are a resolution maker and are thinking about how to set yourself up for success in this coming year then this is the podcast for you and definitely keep listening. 

Our guest is the delightful wonderful Patrice Washington, award winning author and transformational speaker. Patrice is committed to redefining the term wealth, using its original meaning of well being.

Want to learn more about our strategic framework for successful career change? Download The Roadmap to Career Fulfillment ebook right here!

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Transcript:

Lisa Lewis Miller  0:04  

Welcome to the Career Clarity Show. If you want to create a career path you’ll love, you’re in the right place. I’m Lisa Lewis Miller, career change coach, published author and your host, and each week we’ll bring you personal transformation stories, advice and insights from experts about how you can find a more fulfilling, soulful and joyful career. Hello, and welcome, clarity seekers. It’s Lisa Lewis Miller and I’m delighted to be with you here today to kick off this new year right because goodness, wasn’t 2020 a doosie. I am so excited to bring today’s guest on the podcast because we are talking about how to think about defining success, defining wealth, defining achievement, defining your life on your own terms this year and figuring out how to take the steps, be they big or small to create the kind of life that you’re going to feel proud of. You’re going to feel happy with and you’re going to feel like fits you fits who you are, fits your values, fits your needs, fits your lifestyle fits what is coming up for you in your world. So that sounds interesting to you. If you are a resolution maker and you are wanting to talk about and think about how to set yourself up for success in this coming year. Then this is the podcast for you and definitely keep listening. 

Lisa Lewis Miller  1:27  

My guest on today’s podcast is the delightful wonderful Patrice Washington. In 2020 Success Magazine named Patrice Washington one of the 12 inspiring black voices in personal development. And as an award winning author transformational speaker, hope restoring coach and media personality Patrice is committed to redefining the term wealth, using its original meaning of well being. Patrice got her start as your favorite personal finance expert America’s money Maven, but has expanded her brand and mission to encourage women to chase purpose, not money and uses her certification and financial psychology to help the masses get beyond budgets and credit reports and dive into the heart of why we behave the way we do with money. As the host of the redefining wealth podcast, Patrice has built a thriving international community of high achieving women committed to creating a powerful life vision in their careers, home health and personal finances. Patrice, welcome to the Career Clarity Show.

Patrice Washington  2:30  

Thank you for having me. I’m so excited to be here.

Lisa Lewis Miller  2:34  

Well, it feels like such an honor to get to have you on the show. And if anybody is listening to this, and you have not heard the redefining wealth podcast, please go subscribe, go check it out. I was super honored to get to be a guest on it a couple months ago. And it feels like a huge privilege to get to have you on here. But if there’s anybody who’s listening to us today, who has not yet heard of you and your story and what you’ve done in the world, can you share a little bit about your origin story? And why? why it is that you have decided that redefining wealth is part of your mission and your platform here on the world.

Patrice Washington  3:07  

Yeah, so I, first of all, Lisa, I’m really honored to be here. And when I found you, I felt like we were so in alignment when we were introduced by a mutual friend that like we are so in alignment. And we both really have a big focus on purpose and understanding that what we do in the world is bigger than a paycheck. It’s bigger than just having a job, or title or label of some kind. We’re literally here as lightworkers. That’s what I really believe. And redefining wealth is all about my mantra, there is Chase purpose, not money. And so I tell people that you know, I’m not really in this business because of the degree or the certifications, or the textbook things I really got here because of a testimony. And I got here because I truly believe I’m purposed to do the work that I do in the world. And so quick story about that is, like you said in the intro 2020 Wasn’t that a doozy? That was one heck of a year. One year that felt like a decade. I don’t know about everyone else. But for me, it felt like forever, right? Mm hmm. 

Patrice Washington  4:27  

But my purpose was birth in a time that felt very similar. It was during the Great Recession. And it was when the real estate bubble burst, dude, and if you were like me, I was in real estate. I got my license, my salespersons license as 19 while I was in college, and became a real estate and mortgage broker at 21 years old during my senior year in college and built a seven figure real estate Empire by 25 years old. And I thought that that’s what I will do for the rest of life. My life. I was like, Oh, well, this is great. I’m just gonna do this thing. Glad I found it young. I can write this out. And then the real estate bubble burst. And my family and I were soaked. We went from a seven figure business to literally scraping up change. Then to that 2009 I found myself on the bathroom floor of the 600 square foot apartment that we had moved into after our 6000 square foot home foreclosed bawling, snot and crying and saying, God Why me? Like, this wasn’t supposed to happen to me. I went to one of the best universities in in California, if you’re from California, yes, I’m a Trojan you dare not say Bruin? Right. I operated in integrity. I treated people well, I tried to do the best work that I could. And I’m like, I don’t understand. This is not supposed to happen to me. I did what they said to do when I was a little kid, go to school, get good grades, get to college, get a job, start a business, buy a home like I did the thing. So how am I here. And it was in that very broken place in a time that felt very uncertain. very fearful. It was a time that felt for me like 2020 felt for I believe a lot of people What is happening? What is going on? What am I supposed to do now? This is not what I bargained for. And it was on that bathroom floor bawling and crying and asking God why me that I heard that still small voice. That’s what I’ve I’ve think of it that voice that says Get your Bible for me. That’s what it said. And I landed on this scripture was proverbs 1716. And it said, What good is money in the hands of a fool if they have no desire to seek wisdom? What good is money in the hands of a fool if they have no desire to seek wisdom. And that was the very first time we said that it hit me. I had been very smart, book smart Dean’s list, top of the class, I could do all the things I can take all the tests. That’s information. I didn’t have wisdom. And wisdom is knowing when and how to apply what you know. And I didn’t even know how to ask for help. So people around us didn’t know what was happening. They just knew that we moved abruptly from Southern California to that apartment in Metairie, Louisiana, away from all friends, family, and with a newborn baby. And so when people ask me about why I do what I do, it was in that place of feeling the shame, the guilt, the embarrassment of basically being the one in my family, being the one amongst my peers who had quote, unquote, made it and then feeling like I blew it.

Patrice Washington  7:56  

And being confused, because I thought I had made wise choices. I thought I had followed instructions. And so clearly, I’m missing something. And so when I got up off that bathroom floor, the next day, and people always say, Are you exaggerating the next day? No, the next day, the next morning, I started a free blogspot.com I had come from a brick and mortar business, which I obviously lost, I laid off my 16 employees in real estate and loan officers. And we had exhausted our savings. So by the time I was in that apartment, it was a year of floating things and, you know, trying to force things to happen. But I started that free blogspot.com and I said, God, if you restore me, I want to use my life. To show people that this journey is not just about chasing money, we have to seek wisdom at every turn. And I want to be someone that people will look to for wisdom. But honestly, for me, I looked at my face. So like I’m just a conduit, right? I just tried to pass the message messages on in the downloads that I get. And that was March 2009. And so now crazy. 12 years, I’ve lived my life with this mission and through the podcasts through my books, through my speaking through my coaching through my teaching, I’ve literally helped millions of people, hopefully, at the minimum restore hope and know that even in tough times purposes and postponed for many of us it’s revealed

Lisa Lewis Miller  9:32  

Hmm, I love that the hair on my arms was standing up while you were telling that story I kid you not. And the trees one of the things that strikes me is that for so many of us, there’s there’s a bathroom floor moment. You know, I think there are so many people who are listening to this who have been through a bathroom floor moment or who have watched somebody go through a bathroom floor moment and I think I feel like I’ve been reflecting on this a lot in 2020, that I wish I didn’t have to come to the bathroom floor moment, ah, I wish that we could just have that spark of inspiration to say, you know, maybe

Lisa Lewis Miller  10:16  

I can turn the car around, maybe I can shift the direction, maybe I can redefine what I am aiming towards and where I’m headed. Before I have that moment. And I had, I mean, this is certainly not to the same extent, but I had a, what I’ll call a bathroom floor moment for my health earlier this year. For me, I got gout. And for those of you listening, if you don’t know what what gout is, it is a weird buildup of waste product acid in your body that your body can’t clear out. And I am a vegetarian, like I eat healthfully. I’m very intentional about what I put in my body. And for me to have a moment of having a really painful, unexpected health diagnosis out of nowhere, was was such a good wake up call moment for me of man, oh, man, I have let my my body I have let my temple I have let my corporeal form, suffer and haven’t been taking as strong a care of my health and my being as I ought to be. And I just I keep looking back on that moment, and thinking, you know, I really wish I had noticed and paid attention and, and changed the direction and change the purpose and intentionality of my behavior before it had to get to the pain and the diagnosis and the doctor’s appointments. 

Patrice Washington  11:48  

Yeah, oh, my gosh, I think we all feel that way. I think that many of us, though, are hard headed. At least I am. And so I have to sometimes, and I think I’m getting better, I would like to believe that I’m getting better. But I know that over the years, I have experienced what I call the boulder effect, where First there’s that little pebble. And there’s that lead hint of awareness, right? And if it’s a medical thing, maybe was like a bit of discomfort, err, I Huh? What is that thing? But then we ignore it. And we’re like, hmm, I’m getting older. Right? That’s probably normal. We go on, we go on with our day, we go on with the weeks. And then we get that rock kind of thrown at us. And it’s like, Huh, that was, huh. Maybe I’ll look into that. But we’re so busy pursuing the things and being busy and doing all the things that we believe are what we should be doing that we ignore the obvious signs. And we don’t pay attention until there’s a boulder. And that has happened to me in my career, that has happened to me in relationships, that has also happened to me and health. And it’s actually a part of why I’m so committed to redefining wealth. 

Patrice Washington  13:10  

Because as you know, and redefining wealth, the six pillars of wealth, are not about money. And people are always like, you’re the only finance expert. I know that does not talk about money. It’s like I do, but I talk about how other parts of your life are connected to your finances. And I love that you even you know, transparently share with your audience that health journey because our first pillar is the fifth pillar. And it’s about becoming your best self. And I tell people, it’s about being physically and mentally fit for this journey that you’re on for these things that you say you want. Because many of us are praying for things that we don’t have the capacity to sustain. Physically, we can’t even show up and enjoy the fruits of the labor that we’re doing, right? Because we’re so busy chasing the things and doing the stuff that when our body is like, pebble, hey, I need you to take a nap. I’m gonna need you to drink more water. I’m going to need you to you know, do a do a cleanse. You know, here they are gonna need you to do these things. We don’t pay attention. And then when it’s, you know, I have a woman in my community. She just went through one of my programs and she sent me an email and she said, You have no idea how program changed my life, not just because of the work stuff. 

Patrice Washington  14:36  

Because you would remind us to go to our doctor’s appointments and do our annual checkups and do all the things. They found a lump in her throat, the size of an orange and she got it removed just in mid November and she said I hadn’t been to the doctor And yours. And if you wouldn’t have kept saying that if you wouldn’t have shared with us and kept making sure fifth pillar, fifth pillar, you guys, we need to rest we need to take care of ourselves, we need to monitor what we’re putting in our bodies, as we’re building these businesses as we’re pursuing these careers. Because what good are those things if we do not have our health, I would not have known, I would not have known. And when they did the biopsy, it was cancerous. And they removed it all. She’s like, You saved my life. And I take no credit for that. But you know what I’m saying, it’s like this awareness, especially as women entrepreneurs, we, Oh, my gosh, we will get into taking care of everyone else under the sun, Lisa, we will put ourselves at the bottom of the list. And we’re like, well, I’m serving my clients, I’m serving my family, my immediate family and my extended family, and I’m taking care of the things and I’m taking care of everyone, and we look up and we have left nothing for ourselves. And at the end of the day, we can only serve for a full cup. So what’s in the cup is for us, what spills out of the cup is for everyone else, but overflow. And we can’t do that without our health.

Lisa Lewis Miller  16:15  

I love that. And I one of the things that I think is so powerful about your message is how integrated all these different pillars are into a sense of holistic well being. Because when I talk to people about making a career change, getting a new job moving to a new industry, or a new state, it’s never just about the work. It’s never just about what’s happening between nine to five. It’s about who you are in that job. It’s about what that work empowers you to do in the rest of your life. It’s about the boundaries that you have, it’s about the sense of flexibility and freedom, it’s about the way you feel connected to how you’re serving. It is never never just about a job. So for people who are listening to this, and they are thinking about the 2021 ahead that they want to have. And wanting to be thoughtful and mindful about a holistic way to be looking at and strategizing for taking really good care of themselves and ensuring their well being Can you share about your six pillars and we can do a little riffing on where some starting points might be for people who are who are sort of calibrating their thinking for the year ahead about how to start investing in these different elements of their wealth and their life.

Patrice Washington  17:37  

Yeah. So just to finish up in the first pillar, which was fifth pillar, we talked about the physical piece, but I want to make sure that you heard me also say mental fitness, because we forget that this is a tough journey. 2020 wasn’t just a tough year, I mean, life, life is just what it is. And it requires us to have a mental fortitude that I don’t think many of us think about, especially because we’ve experienced, for many of us a lot of childhood trauma. And sometimes we don’t realize that the things that we want the most. It’s not that we’re not good enough or not smart enough or not capable. It’s that many of us haven’t dealt with some of the childhood trauma and the self talk, the negative self talk or the doubt or those things. And so I encourage people go sit on the couch, and this day and age, go sit on, you know, get on the virtual couch, do it on your phone. But mental health is so important to protect, especially in a time like this one, many of us are more isolated than we normally are. And it’s hard, it’s we’re physically isolated. Make sure that you’re mentally and physically well, so that you’re equipped for the journey. So that’s the first thing. The second one I would say, for us is the people pillar. So we talk a lot about creating relationships that matter. And I’m sure this is the same in the in like the career space specifically that it is who you know, and who knows you too, right? It is about being genuine and creating relationships and giving value and making sure that you are both present and present. So just because you’re in someone’s physical presence, it doesn’t always mean that you’re there. Like you’re there. 

Patrice Washington  19:24  

Mentally you’re present, right. And so, in order for us to attract the opportunities or for people to be our advocates for people to be speaking so highly of us when we are not in the room. We have to really be intentional about how we pursue quality relationships. And I think a lot of times people are trying to force their ways into circles and into opportunities when really if you just treated people well and delivered value to the people you already serve and the people you already connected. With you wouldn’t have to force or manipulate your way into opportunities. And so for me folks will say, How did you meet so and so? And how did you it’s just like how we were connected, mutual, you know, connection. And now we’re connected my your, you know, you’ve, you’ve supported me and my community and come on my podcast. And you know, I’m sure we’ll do many things to support each other for years to come. So it’s about building genuine, valuable relationships, not looking to people for what you can get, but always thinking about how can we create a Give, give. And that has been the secret sauce, to my stance on national television, national radio segment. And all of the opportunities that I’ve gotten, they were not because I tried to force anything they were because of building genuine relationships and being willing to serve.

Lisa Lewis Miller  20:54  

Well, let’s pause on that for a moment. Because I know that people who are listening to the Career Clarity Show have heard me talk about the power of relationships and the power of thinking about this idea of networking, not as this transactional like power suits at happy hour in a smoky bar somewhere, but thinking about it as building friendships, and making it feel much more heart centered, much more genuine and authentic. But I know that there are people for whom that’s just not how they’ve ever thought about relationships outside of personal friendships. You know, they they feel that way in their personal friendships, you know, in the girlfriends who you’re going to text about what you’re watching on TV, or you know what the latest book is that you read. But they have a hard time taking that same model of thinking and bringing it into a space where opportunities can start to come to you. And doors will open themselves to you in a more professional capacity. So can you share a little bit more about how you think about the people pillar, when it’s beyond friendships, when it’s people who have more of a professional connection to you?

Patrice Washington  22:06  

You know, what’s funny? What people don’t realize about me in particular to leases, then I’m actually an introvert. So as much as I’m very outspoken on stages, that’s not how I recharge, like, that’s not that’s how I utilize my gift in the marketplace. Because I feel that I have a responsibility to use my gift. But it’s not natural for me to like, I don’t I don’t, I don’t really talk a lot outside of like work, I’m not that person. If I’m at my neighbor’s house, and someone is there and they go, what do you do, I’m the person that butterflies go in my stomach, as accomplished as I am. I don’t like to talk about work. Like I don’t, I don’t like to talk about work and do those things. I like to build relationships with people, genuinely. And so what I would say to someone who’s like, but that’s from my personal relationships, is that it’s not that you’re trying to be someone’s best friend, the moment that you meet them. It’s not that. But it’s also but it is about understanding that you have a gift, you have value. And maybe coming from a place of when you hear a buzz word, or when you hear that something someone needs, falls in line with what you already gifted in, it’s in being the type of person who’s like, well, that’s actually what I do in my space. So that’s what I do in my field of expertise, and then just offering nuggets of value. It’s not about pushing up on people for what you think they can do for you. 

Patrice Washington  23:45  

Because I actually never asked people what do you do? That’s the other thing. I don’t start conversations with, what do you do, and I don’t offer what I do, just to offer it up. It’s literally, even in a business setting, I will talk to people about everything under the sun except what they do. But then they can feel that there’s a genuine interest about who they really are. And you would be surprised that most people are so tired of answering the question, what do you do? It’s the reason that in career transitions, people struggle because their whole identity becomes what they do for a living. Right? And so have you become a person who is not consumed with caring about what people do, but you’re literally like, looking at the person and their their countenance like their spirit, their energy, and having a genuine conversation. Even on LinkedIn, that’s possible. Believe it or not, I’ve had people ask me questions on LinkedIn that had nothing to do with work. did it end up turning into that was that strategy? I don’t know. But I liked it. I like that they sent me a message. My daughter, I like that, that it wasn’t just what can the money Maven do for me, and that they were willing to play a long game? And I don’t think that it will, it might have been strategy initially. But it allowed something to form. So I would say, you know, it’s not about making it. I think in this day and age, Lisa, we are just too committed to strategy. Oh, hey, everything is like a strategic like, if I do this, then they’ll do that. And then maybe I’m a heart centered spirit lead person. And that’s not to say that I don’t have structure because I’m also a businesswoman. 

Patrice Washington  25:36  

So obviously, I have structure I have team, I have things in place. But my team will even say that I say yes to people that I want to say yes to. And even some of the large podcasts where I don’t really vibe with the hosts, we’ve turned it down. Because it’s not about trying to use anyone in particular, because already what’s for me is for me, so if I’m doing something with someone, I want my audience, I want people to know that if Patrice say yes, they’re probably good. That is not just the opportunity play. And I think that if and I’m not saying that I’m the right way to do it, but I’m saying, It’s, this has been a blessing for me. And I’ve had no shortage of opportunities, in many, many ways. And it was not because Oh, this is so and so. And they do this, that I’m now going to try to force something. And I think letting your guard down to just see people as people, not people as titles.

Lisa Lewis Miller  26:35  

Yeah, that’s so important. And I feel like the more you can give yourself the space and the permission, not to think about every conversation having to have a specific ROI. Yes, giving it space for connectedness, giving it space for humaneness. Giving it space for authenticity is so often where the beautiful connections and relationships are born from that then can bear who knows what kind of fruit over time as you go on. So I love that philosophy of being present in your presence, connectedness moment and looking for ways to add value and to serve others. Because not only is that making the the people pillar more fun, right? It’s so much more enjoyable to have a conversation where you’re looking for connection, rather than looking for some sort of transactional return on your time.

Lisa Lewis Miller  27:29  

But it makes the the ability for opportunities to come to you just as possible.

Patrice Washington  27:36  

Well because then people feel like they’re connecting someone with their friend. Right? Like, that’s literally it. Like they’re like, oh, meet my friend. So the people who have put me in places are putting me on stages that I’m gonna be honest, and not from some like weird imposter syndrome stance. I literally don’t know that I was equipped at the time to walk through some of the doors that I walked through. It was who opened the door for me, that made other people say, Okay, well, I guess she’s ready. It’s the it’s, it was what made me say, Well, okay, I guess you’re ready, you’re gonna have to practice and suit up. Because you’re getting thrown in the game. And it’s time, right? And there are things that I know that some of my peers who I believe were more talented than me, going into those seasons, probably looked and said, Well, why did she get that opportunity? Why did they choose her for that contract? How did she win that proposal? It was my people killer. It was being genuine and giving behind the scenes in ways that didn’t even have anything to do with my profession. You know, sometimes just sharing a word of encouragement with someone or saying, Hey, I’m thinking about your Hey, how is your dog because last time we talked, I think your dog had a surgery or something. It was literally that. And the connection is I’ve been able to build and create multiple, seven figures over these last several years. And it was never for me forcing my way into anything. And so when people say, No, there’s got to be more than that. I don’t know what to tell you. The more is because this is literally what I’ve done. And it’s it’s paid off and it continues to pay off. Literally every week. There’s something in my email.

Lisa Lewis Miller  29:31  

So what a beautiful exclamation point to put on the people pillar for those of you who are listening and thinking about how can I take this and turn it into a resolution for me? I feel like Patrice you just gave some fabulous examples and stories of ways to make it feel good in the doing and good in the in the moving towards as well as good in what that might open up for you. But I want to make sure we don’t shortchange the rest of the pillars so keep us going.

Patrice Washington  30:01  

We have a little cheat sheet, Lisa, I’ll give you a link to a cheat sheet to put in the show notes so you guys can get them. But I’ll tell you, the next one is the space pillar. And I think this is a big one that we don’t always connect either to wealth building. But for me, we say that space is about setting up your life to support you. And so many of us waste so much time we hear Time is money, but we don’t take that seriously. So a lot of us waste valuable time. Looking for things we already own, but can never find, you know, sifting through what, what, what I call clutter. And in redefining wealth, we say clutter is the physical manifestation of chaos in your mind. A lot of times, the answers that we’re looking for are already there, they’re already right in front of us the creativity that we wish we had, it’s there, it’s just blocked, because we’re dealing with clutter. And when people think of clutter, a lot of times they think of like hoarders on the AMA. And they’re like, Oh, my gosh, that’s clutter. But many of us who live in functional spaces are still dealing with a lot of clutter, it may be hidden in that junk drawer in the kitchen, which is supposed to be a utility drawer, by the way, not a junk drawer. But it may be in that drawer in the kitchen, it may be in that closet, or that guest bedroom spare room that you stuff everything into, it may be in that storage unit that you got after you filled up the garage, and every closet in your house with stuff that you no longer need that no longer serving you. 

Patrice Washington  31:41  

So not only do many people buy the same things over and over again, because they can’t find it. So that’s a waste of money. But we also, I believe, shut down the ability to really think about what’s next. Because our space is not set up to serve that level of what’s next. Our space is actually holding us back in many ways. And it’s not about the size of your space. It’s not about oh, I live in a one bedroom apartment or studio apartment, or I live in a six bedroom home in the country or it’s not about that at all. But it’s about understanding that typically, if you’re blocked in some area, there’s probably clutter nearby that represents that area. If you are having blocks in your workspace, maybe your space is not set up to be a money making space. When I was writing my one of my first books, I remember being in my spare bedroom, which was also the office and behind the desk, there was stuff on the bed. And it every time I walked in that room, the room I was going to to create my energy would be zapped because I was like, you know that sounds you make that face you make when you’re like, Okay, I got to deal with that. Okay, I had to deal with that. But then you don’t. So now I’m sitting here I’m going well, I have writer’s block. I can’t I don’t have the words, I don’t know what to write I, I know kind of what I want to say, but it’s not coming to me. So I would leave and go to a hotel, I will leave and go to a hotel. And I still do that from time to time because you know, family in they want to chat all day. Like I have got to write this book, my book that’s coming out in a couple months here, right? But finally, I had to ask myself, are you in a money making space? Like does this look like the workspace of a six figure? author? Does this look like the workspace? like is this the setup of someone who takes this seriously? Or is this a setup with someone who’s playing author who’s pretending to want to be an author, right. 

Patrice Washington  33:51  

And so when I start to do that, I have to start changing my space and just start changing the energy of my space, I had to start being selective about who I would allow into my space. Because even family, every energy is not welcome to my sacred space where I work or where I create it just is what it is. And so over the years, I’ve learned that protecting your space is a big part of your path to prosperity. Because if you don’t have your space set up to support you, you’ll always be distracted with things that are basically beneath your calling. Laundry thrown on a bed is beneath your calling, like if you have a bigger message to deliver. So how do you set your life up your calendar up your routine up to make sure that your spaces are in alignment with who you say you are and who you say you’re becoming for 2021

Lisa Lewis Miller  34:48  

I feel like that’s a mic drop moment right there. We could end the interview and leave everybody thinking about that question of how am I actively creating obstacles clutter in the spaces that I say I want to be a different way. Whether it’s your mind, whether it’s your calendar, whether it’s your physical space, I feel like I got to go sit and chew on that one Patrice update by 2021 goals. I love that.

Patrice Washington  35:19  

Um, yeah, I love it’s been a game changer. For me, it’s been a game changer for me, and just the way I operate my business over the years. And I always work from home. But it’s just been, you know, it’s been a complete game changer. And then fourth, because I know we want to get through these pillars. So I’m going to tell you guys really quickly, but there’s so juicy, but you’ll get the cheat sheet. Okay, so four is faith, it’s about believing in something greater. Of course, least I tell people, it’s not about believing what I believe it’s about understanding that. If you say you believe in something, it’s probably wise that you make time to practice it. Because life is coming. It’s not if it’s coming, it’s when, and you don’t want to figure out who you are and what you believe when you’re in the midst of a crisis. You want to already know, some foundational principles, scriptures, belief sayings, whatever resonates with your, your understanding of whatever higher power you may believe in, so that you can lean on that because most people give up right before their biggest breakthrough is going to happen. 

Patrice Washington  36:29  

Most people go to the graveyard with their best book, their best work, the best songs in their heart, all the things, because they gave up a little too soon. And had they held on maybe a little longer, right, they could have seen the actual fruits of their labor. And so for me, faith helps build the resilience that all of us will need at some point. And if 2020 taught us nothing else, it taught us that you better believe in something, are you gonna fall for everything, there’s so much going on that you don’t know where to go personally, find your own piece. And for some of us 2020, while difficult was the best year financially, ever. And I think that’s because some folks heard pandemic, and they heard social unrest, and they heard all these things, and their fate told them none of this is happening to you, it’s happening for you. And all you need to do is know that purposes and postpone this is your time to activate and to keep taking action and keep moving forward. And some people heard, shut down being complete fear they heard outside was shut down. But then they shut down inside. It became the absolute worst. And I’m not taking away from the very real things, job loss and family loss and health compromises. And I’m not taking away from any of that. But I believe that faith is a great component for for anyone who’s building wealth, building a new career, you know, setting new goals for this year, that you just put it on the calendar, whatever your faith requires time to pray, time to journal time to meditate, time to be one with nature, time to chant tongues, whatever it is, you do, make time for it. Because you can’t say your career, or chasing money has prevented you from doing this part of life. Because it’s the very thing that’s gonna sustain you when life gets tough.

Lisa Lewis Miller  38:42  

That’s so important. And for those of you who are listening and thinking like, wow, this resonates, this makes a lot of sense, I can really appreciate wanting to have spiritual grounding and whatever I’m doing moving forward. And the data backs us up to right. And I’m sure, Patrice, you’ve looked at tons of studies and whatnot around this. But if you’re listening to this, and you don’t already know this, when they do studies of the healthiest, most resilient, longest term sustainable leaders, and they look at what are the factors, what are the commonalities between these people who are leaders in business, who are leaders in countries and governance, what they see as a commonality. And I frankly, I haven’t figured out exactly how we can be serving this to the highest level at Career Clarity Show. But what they found is that all the leaders at the top of their game in whatever their game is, have some kind of sense of grounded spirituality, whether that is in a structured religious way, whether it is in a more sort of ethereal way. It’s there and it’s part of the sense of mission and the sense of purpose that drives what they’re doing. So if you’re listening to this and you’re thinking, you know what I feel like I’m not a religious person. I’d encourage you to still sit with these Questions that Patrice is bringing up to think about? what way does spirituality play a role in my life? And how do I feel connected to something outside of my own lived experience? But let’s keep on rolling for people who are wanting to the last two pillars.

Patrice Washington  40:23  

So the last two are work in money. And so work is about living your life’s purpose. The big thing I’ve learned just, even before I got my certification and financial psychology, when I used to offer financial counseling one on one back in the day, like 2010, the thing that kept coming up is I realized that my clients are the ones who would say, Well, I’m struggling with a budget, or I don’t know why I can’t get this right, or why I can’t figure it out very brilliant people, by the way, many college educated, many great work experience and backgrounds, right. And they would say, Oh, I can’t budget, I can’t do this, I can’t do that. I would say that it’s not the budget, your behavior is actually just a symptom of a deeper problem, which is that you are unfulfilled, you’re unfulfilled and what you do day in and day out all be it fancy, and you have the nice title and it looks good on paper, you’re genuinely not happy, you’re unfulfilled, and therefore, you use money to fill the void. 

Patrice Washington  41:30  

And that looks like buying people are buying things. If we’re not buying people, we’re buying things either we’re buying things we don’t need, going back to the space pillar buying things we already own. So we have eight pairs of black shoes and six black dresses. And we’re like no, but this one has a strap on this side, and this one has a bow, you look the same. There’s no real difference. And so either we’re buying things, I’m gonna move to the bigger house, I’m gonna move to the bigger neighborhood, or the better neighborhood, I’m gonna put my kids in the next best school, and I’m gonna do this. And it’s constantly trying to prove that this money has validated something for you. But in fact, you’re really still very much experiencing a large void from not doing work that you truly love and work that you feel purposed and created to do. Or you’re buying people. So you’re trying to prove to other people that you are successful, and you do have it together. And so you’ve developed the Savior complex. So you’re the Savior at the bar, when bars were open, right? You’re, you’re the person paying for this round at the happy hour, and you’re the person saying no, don’t pay me back. It’s okay. Even though you may actually need it back and you have your own den to deal with or you’re, you’re using money to fill a void, that money will never fill. The only thing that can fill it is knowing that your purpose on this earth is being fulfilled, and you are doing work that doesn’t just energize and excite you, because that’s passion. It has to also serve a purpose. For others. That’s purpose. And once you are in that lane, you don’t need to use money to do all those things. Once you understand the purpose that you have, now you can better set priorities. And now, you can do what you’ve always known to do. because money is not this whole secret thing. There’s some very basic principles, right? That we’ve all heard of many times before, but we don’t do it because our life is so cluttered with pillars one through five. And so that’s it, those are the pillars.

Lisa Lewis Miller  43:38  

And there’s so much interconnection between all those things, you know, if you’re looking at this space pillar, and you’re thinking about creating more mental space, and there is this cross pollination with the fifth pillar and mental health and mental fitness, you know, when you’re looking at the work pillar and feeling unfulfilled, and feeling not lit up by your work, and then you’re using money, to try to buy a fix, to buy the happiness to buy the peace of mind to buy the whatever to give you that sense of exhale. And that sense of sort of a homecoming and an arrival in what feels authentic to you and your values. You can see how being out of whack in any of these dimensions can start to have ripple effects that can trickle into some of the other ones too. So Patrice, I just think that this is such a helpful model for organizing one’s thoughts, organizing one’s hopes and desires and then a setting a plan and an intention for what you want 2021 to hold.

Patrice Washington  44:39  

Yeah, these are the ways these are the areas of life that I set goals in every quarter. I don’t set goals for the year I set them for the quarter. And this is why I’m actually teaching my audience this month to about setting up their life by the pillars so that as you pursue whatever It is your call to do in the world, you don’t forget, you keep an awareness of these other pieces. So you never just, you don’t want to be completely deficient in the faith pillar, but be like, oh, but my relationships are great. Like, literally you want to keep an awareness in each pillar. And I’ve set my goals by this since 2003. Lisa, not new to this, I say I’m true to this, like I’ve set my goals using. I didn’t call them pillars back then. But using these these categories, if you will, and having just a few goals per year of things I want to maintain or sustain or explore, you know, or unpack and instead of having one new year’s resolution, that may put all of my effort into one area. And now everything else goes to the wayside. I don’t want to do that. So I want to be well rounded. And I want us to think about again, not just what do we want out of 2021. But who do we want to become Who are we willing to become in the process. So that we take on some new behaviors, some new beliefs and new traits, some new routines that become a part of just who we are. And now as we continue to grow, we’re just adding to that, we’re not trying to do quick fixes. This is not about a quick fix. This is about literally shifting our mindset, like really.

Lisa Lewis Miller  46:37  

And shifting your life as a product of shifting your mindset, which is what I think both of us are all about, and our work and our teaching is if you get if you get the beliefs, right? If you get the values, right, if you get the stories, right, so that they are serving you so that they’re coming from a place of abundance. They’re not coming from a place of fear and scarcity. Yeah, your whole reality can shift.

Patrice Washington  47:03  

Yeah, and it only takes a shift in one thing to change everything. And so don’t get overwhelmed. If you hear me saying, you know, talking about these six pillars, I don’t want you to go oh my gosh, now I gotta set a money goal. And I gotta set a faith goal. And I have to set a it’s not that it’s understanding that this, this takes time. It doesn’t happen overnight. It’s the intentionality, it’s the awareness. But it’s also knowing that doing one thing, in each one of these pillars can shift everything. And what may have began as a rocky decade, some have already claimed that this was going to be a difficult decade just because of what 2020 look like. But shifting one thing as you’re listening to this can change everything for 2021. And for the rest of the decade, the rest of your life.

Lisa Lewis Miller  47:54  

I love that. Patrice, thank you so much for coming on the Career Clarity Show today and for dropping these nuggets of wisdom, these nuggets of brilliant if somebody is listening to this and they have been just eating out of the palm of your hand and they’re loving this and they want more Patrice in their life, what are the best places for them to go?

Patrice Washington  48:16  

So two places first places my website PatriceWashington.com as a matter of fact, if you want to really hear more about the pillars in detail the way I broke it down when all this first started, you can go to PatriceWashington.com/starthere. And my favorite place to play is actually on Instagram, I’m @seekwisdomPCW on Instagram. And those are those are two places where you can catch me.

Lisa Lewis Miller  48:47  

Amazing, we will definitely put those in the show notes as links for anybody who wants to find out more about the pillars about redefining wealth, and about making some of these incredible life changing inner shifts, that reveals so, so much more about what’s possible in our purpose. Patrice, thank you for being here.

Patrice Washington  49:07  

Thank you so much, Lisa.

Lisa Lewis Miller  49:15  

And that’s a wrap. Let us know what you thought about today’s episode. leave us a review on Apple podcasts. Because not only can your stars and words help us find great guests and topics to feature on future episodes. Your input also helps other people find the resources they need to discover the work that lights them up. And make sure to check out my book Career Clarity Show finally find the work that fits your values and lifestyle for the link to order it go to GetCareerClarity.com/book and don’t forget to get your other tools resources and helpful goodies at GetCareerClarity.com/podcast. Thanks again for joining us for the Career Clarity Show today. And remember if you don’t love your work We should talk because life is too short to be doing work that doesn’t light you up. Talk to you next time.

About the Author Lisa Lewis

Lisa is a career change coach helping individuals feeling stuck to find work that fits. She helps people clarify who they are, what they want most, and what a great job for them looks like so they can make their transition as easily as possible. Lisa completed coaching training in Jenny Blake’s Pivot Method, Danielle LaPorte’s Fire Starter Sessions, Kate Swoboda's Courageous Living Coaching Certification, and the World Coaches Institute. In addition to that, she apprenticed with the top career coaches in the country so she can do the best possible work with — and for — you. She's helped more than 500 individuals move into more fulfilling, yummy careers and would be honored to get to serve you next!

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